Three years after making history as the first spoken-word artist to win America’s Got Talent, Brandon Leake found himself confronting a very different kind of challenge—one that couldn't be solved onstage. “I feel like it was teaching me to never lose sight of the things I prayed for before the fame. Because I wanted to be a husband and a father long before I ever wanted to be a poet. And those are the things I now prioritize over everything.”
That journey included an unexpected panic attack; an experience Leake describes as both frightening and strangely peaceful. “It was the first and only time I’ve ever dealt with that, and I remember this increasingly tense feeling inside my chest. But I also remember this calmness in my spirit as I heard God give me clarity on what’s coming next. It was one of the most surreal moments I’ve ever experienced.”
For an artist accustomed to turning emotion into words, the challenge wasn't finding something to say—it was deciding whether to let anyone hear it. “It wasn’t hard to find the words; it was hard being bold enough and vulnerable enough to let it be seen. The words came, and they came quickly. I’m just a fairly private person and I wasn’t sure if I wanted the world to know everything, I had going on.”
Fatherhood brought another layer of uncertainty when his daughter was diagnosed with an autoimmune condition. “Fatherhood didn’t change, but I did have to wrestle with changes of expectation. Things you aspire for your kids to do and hopes you have for them. And constant doctor appointments, treatment, etc. just aren’t in those plans. But it doesn’t make it less beautiful, it doesn’t rob us of anything. I’m blessed to be her father.”
Photo: MillaJo Photography
His ability to navigate that uncertainty is deeply connected to his own family history. “My mother was 25 years old when my sister died. I was 31 when my daughter was diagnosed. If my mom was able to raise me in a loving household with affection and care, then I could be okay in my uncertainty.” The experience ultimately made the title of his album more personal. “It made the name of my album far more real. Genuinely it brought so much into perspective.” But perspective didn't eliminate the questions. There were moments when faith itself felt fragile. “I had a moment sitting in my house when the rest of my family was at our Airbnb. It was empty and quiet, and it broke me because my house was a place full of life. But that quiet truly rattled my spirit.”
During those moments, his wife gave him something he didn't always give himself: permission to be vulnerable. “She gave me moments to not have to be Superman. She let me have times where I could be weak, but she also gave me the reins to move our family in the best scenarios that we possible could.” That vulnerability is something Leake believes more men should embrace. “I’m not okay, and I need help.” Financial uncertainty also challenged his understanding of what it means to provide for a family. “As the provider for my family it made me feel inadequate at times. But slowing down taught me that being a provider isn’t solely financial.” He says he never felt guilty for struggling emotionally while his daughter was facing her own health challenges. “Nope, I knew that no one should feel okay in that circumstance. Especially since I witnessed my mother walk a far worse journey with my sister.”
Eventually, the experiences became Intimacy. “About a year and a half into the respite.” The title represents exactly what Leake was willing to do with the project: allow himself to be fully seen. “It means being vulnerable, it means being seen in the good and the bad. It means allowing the light to rest on all of you.” Writing has always been part of his healing process, but this time was different. “It always has been, it was just different because I don’t think I ever went this far.”
At its core, Intimacy explores the uncomfortable space between faith and uncertainty. “Faith is about living in the in between of belief and uncertainty. God desires our relationship to exist and persist even in the midst of discomfort. Answers are beautiful to have and needed at times. But not all questions have answers at the times we want them.” And perhaps nowhere is that evolution more evident than in the way Leake now understands hope. “Hope 3 years ago looked like full tour schedules, a larger bank account, and a massive following. Now it looks like a peaceful home, happy family, and a full bank account lol. But more than anything I want my life to reflect something that God would be proud of.”
For anyone listening to Intimacy while facing anxiety, fear, family crisis or questions about faith, Leake's message is ultimately one of reassurance. “God has never not seen you. God has never given up on you. God has always seen you beautiful. And if the creator of all things sees you as worthy, you better see yourself that way too.” And after everything—the fame, the fear, fatherhood, uncertainty and the questions—Leake says the greatest change isn't what he has achieved. “The greatest difference would be my willingness to surrender. I learned far too much about how necessary it is. And how beautiful it can be.”